Humour
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November 10th, 2021
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A Day in the Life of a Parts Guy

You arrive early and open the doors full of hope and energy. You love your job! You love your customers! Life is wonderful!

As you get the computers warmed up, you check your messages and see a note that the freight will be late today. No surprise, as the freight has been late every day this month. The odds are good that it would be late again today. Honestly, if the freight company had called to say it would be on time, you would probably rush out and buy a lottery ticket. Ah well, a little delivery delay isn’t going to spoil this amazing morning!

You pour yourself a coffee before hitting the ground running. You will drink this one because you like coffee, knowing it will probably be the only coffee of the day that you will actually enjoy. The rest of the day, coffee will purely be a coping tool.

A Day in the Life of a Parts Guy

The work day starts as the first mechanic walks up to the counter looking for his parts. He seems personally insulted that the freight is running late. You remind him that he also ordered his parts a day late. He does not like that you remembered this little fact.

The door chime signals the first actual customer of the day. As he walks up to the counter, the *phone starts to ring*. Good timing.

“Bob’s Parts, please hold.”

The customer pretends to look at items he has no interest in buying, trying not to look like he is waiting for you.

You set the phone down: “Good morning, what can we do for you?” (Note: this pleasant greeting will shorten throughout the day. By 4 pm it may be down to a grunt and a nod.)

“Yeah, I have a 2015 Snowchaser widget on order, supposed to be in this morning.”

In your head you think, oh yes, I recall telling you that our freight normally comes in at 10 am so it would only make sense for you to show up at 8:30.

Outside voice: “Sorry, the freight is late today, I probably won’t see it until 11.”

Customer: “I won’t be in town at 11…” He trails off to an awkward silence. This pause is for you to try and solve his problem for him, perhaps by inventing time travel or maybe teleportation.

*phone starts ringing* “Bob’s Parts, please hold.”

The door chimes again as the next customer wanders in.

“I got a call that my new shock was in?”

“You bet, let me grab it.”

As you hand the customer his parts, his eyes narrow. “This doesn’t look right.”

You remind him that he didn’t know which model it was exactly that he was working on when he ordered it. He scratches his head.

Here it comes—dontsayitdontsayitdontsayit.

The client shrugs: “I thought they were all the same.”

You pull a muscle in your head trying to suppress an eyeroll.

*phone starts ringing* “Bob’s Parts, please hold.”

While the customer looks at his incorrect shock in wonderment, you take a moment to grab one of the lines on hold:

“No, sorry the freight’s not in yet.” You briefly consider recording this as the on-hold message to play until 10 am every day.

Back to the shock guy.

“So I’m guessing you have an X model not the standard model. I can get you the right one for tomorrow.”

Inside voice: My apologies for guessing wrong from your lack of information.

*phone starts ringing* “Bob’s Parts, please hold.”

You look up and another mechanic is standing behind you.

“What’s up, Dave?”

“Remember that chaincase bolt you ordered me? I actually need two.”

Inside voice: I guess maybe you should have ordered two then.

Outside voice: “No problem, I ordered an extra one.”

*phone starts ringing* “Bob’s Parts, please hold.”

Another customer at the counter:

“Hey I ordered a throttle block the other day, did it come in?”

“You bet, it came in yesterday. Here you go!”

Customer: “There’s no cable with it?”

You: “Nooo..?” Here it comes—dontsayitdontsayitdontsayit.

Customer: “I assumed it would come with it.”

*phone starts ringing* “Bob’s Parts, please hold.”

Mechanic has returned:

“Remember that bolt I needed? That was the small one, I actually needed the bigger one beside it.”

Inside voice: (Edited for children—insert mostly four letter words here.)

Outside voice: “It will be tomorrow then, sorry.”

Back to one of the on-hold lines: “Hey, you been looked after? No, okay, what can I do for you? Yep I’ve got several here. Red, blue, black—your choice. $179.99.”

Customer: “How much??”

Here it comes.

Customer: “I can get it cheaper online.”

The little vein in your forehead is starting to show.

*phone starts ringing* “Bob’s Parts, please hold.”

Another customer at the counter starts telling his story about how he bought a used sled but it needed a belt and he has a belt but it’s from his old sled and the numbers are different and it looks kinda the same but: “Will it fit?”

Inside voice: Sure, put it on. The engineers at the factory don’t know anything.

Outside voice: “The angles are different, I wouldn’t run it.”

“How much for a new one?”

*phone starts ringing* “Bob’s Parts, please hold.”

You notice another mechanic standing behind you.

“Did that fuel line show up?”

“NO, THE FREIGHT’S NOT IN YET.”

“Oh, okay. You ordered me the one for the right-hand side, I was thinking we should order the left-hand one as well.”

“Sure, that will be another day though…”

Mechanic: “Get it coming, I can wait.”

Inside voice: If you can wait, then why did we airfreight the first one??

Back to customer at the counter.

Customer: “Did your freight come in yet?”

You glance at the clock…it’s 8:43 am. You hope that no one hears your audible sigh.

You start to wonder how much your family would miss you if you ran away to Mexico. A beach sounds pretty good about now. You hate your job. You hate your customers. Life is terrible.

Another customer comes in with his small daughter. You remember them from the previous week when they were trying to troubleshoot the used 120 cc mini they had recently acquired. “Good morning!”

Customer: “Hey we are just heading out riding, the 120 is running like a top! You nailed it, the problem was exactly what you said!”

You: “Awesome, so glad we figured it out!”

Customer: “So Charlotte insisted we stop by on our way out of town.”

The little girl shyly hands you a piece of paper. In crayon she has drawn a picture of her snowmobiling with her dad. The words “Thank you” are scrawled awkwardly across the bottom.

 

Okay, you love your job.

*phone starts ringing*

 

– Marty